I’ve always believed that everyone has their own preferences in life. But truly understanding that idea took me years, and surprisingly, I have my elder niece to thank for it. In many ways, she has been teaching me about people without even realising it.
I’ve always enjoyed connecting with people. Talking to strangers has never felt uncomfortable to me. Sometimes a simple conversation can go on for hours. What fascinates me most are the stories people carry with them. Every person has a story behind their face, and if we never take the time to listen, we may never understand why they think or act the way they do.
Recently, my niece made me reflect on this even more deeply. Watching her grow has reminded me that being different is not something negative. In fact, it’s something we can learn from.
None of us is perfect.
We all have our strengths and weaknesses. When we start acknowledging them, we slowly understand what suits us and what doesn’t. That awareness helps us make better choices about the kind of life we want.
When I think back to myself at 19 and compare it with my niece today, I realise she is far more mature and aware of how the world works. My own upbringing was very different. I grew up in a very protected environment. My childhood was mostly about doing what I enjoyed and what made me happy.
We weren’t a wealthy family, but my dad was English-educated and always encouraged me to pursue the things I loved.
After I graduated from secondary school, I told my dad I wanted to study medicine. He never said no. Instead, he calmly explained that the journey to becoming a doctor would be long and demanding. Looking back, what surprises me is that he never once mentioned money or financial pressure.
Somehow life took a different turn. I ended up enrolling in an IT course because my neighbour was going to the same college. It wasn’t exactly a carefully planned decision. It just happened.
After graduating, I had one clear goal. I wanted to work in Singapore. I really wanted it. But for the first time in my life, my dad stopped me.
I remember feeling angry and confused. I couldn’t understand why he suddenly refused something I wanted so badly.
Four or five years later, after I had already been working for some time, my dad suddenly said something unexpected.
“You can go to Singapore and try your luck if you want.”
My first reaction was disbelief.
What? Only now?
By then, it already felt too late. I had started building my life in Malaysia. The idea of leaving everything behind and starting over in another country didn’t feel realistic any more.
Later, we talked about it again. That was when my dad explained his reason.
He said he knew that if I went abroad, I would probably love the life there. And he was afraid that once I left, I might never come back.
When I think about it now, he was probably right. I might have stayed overseas and built my life somewhere else.
In many ways, my dad understood me better than I understood myself. He raised me to pursue what I love and what I’m passionate about, not simply what brings the most money.
For that, I’m grateful. ❤️
And when I look at my niece today, I realise she is very different from who I was at her age. But that difference isn’t wrong. She simply grew up in a different environment, with different experiences shaping her views.
Everyone grows up differently.
And because of that, everyone ends up choosing different paths in life.
Looking back, I realise my life could easily have turned out very differently. My niece’s journey will likely be different from mine too. And that’s perfectly fine.
Different childhoods shape different perspectives, and those perspectives shape the choices we make.
All About Life and Balance 